| Quote | Person Quoted |
|
 | "“When I was very young I learned something very important from watching Sesame Street that I always apply to my current role. They had a game that was called "one is not like the other".”" | ********* ********** |
|
 | ""Jesus Christ, we gotta do all this with a Commanding Officer who has his head so far up his fuckin' ass, that lump in his throat is his goddamn nose"" | SSgt. "Wild" Bill Guarnere 101st Airborne, Easy Company 1944 (Band of Brothers) |
|
| "Naming of Pets & Kids" | Fieldmouse |
|
| "In Belgium on Business" | Cannot Disclose (again!) |
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| "In a choice between lucky and good……… always chose lucky because being good isn’t always enough!" | Dave's Father |
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| "Waking Up Saturday Morning" | Undisclosed |
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| "The Value Of A Drink" | Multiple - but submitted by a she meathead |
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| "Few Good Men" | |
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| "I went back to the office so nobody would think I was out drinking all afternoon." | Cannot Disclose |
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| "The Liberals have a proven record of overtaxing you while you're alive, ... and the NDP wants to tax you when you're dead." | Stephen Harper |
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| "It's been so cold this spring, I've seen Liberals walking around with their hands in their own pockets." | Stephen Harper |
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| "Secret of efficient agricultural engineering" | Joseff Stalin |
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| "Something about women..." | The Russian people |
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| "Busier than a double-peckered dog in heat" | Same Meathead |
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| "Harder than frozen Coon shit on the highway!" | A Meathead |
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| "Trying is the first step towards failure." | Homer |
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| "I'm not normally a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me Superman." | Homer |
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| "Your mother is obviously very stressed at the moment, so we'll let her clear away the dinner in peace." | Homer |
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| "You tried and you failed. The lesson is: Never try." | Homer |
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| "If something is hard, it is not worth doing." | Homer |
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| "Meathead" | A meathead |
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| "I've been fightin' wolves since before you were suckin' on your mother's teet!" | Grounds Keeper Willie |
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| "What did he expect me to do? Fall on my back and shit nickles?" | Rick Loucks |
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| "Ya like beer, don't ya?" | David Robins |
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| "My cat's breath smells like cat food." | Ralph Wiggims |
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| "Mommy, can you open my milk?" | Ralph Wiggims |
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| "What's a battle?" | Ralph Wiggims |
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| "Dumber than a bag of hammers!" | Ted |
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